See I already forgot. I had a better title. I had more interesting stuff. It's gone-O. Along with all of my chocolate, my book of phone numbers, the list I made of all the stuff I have to get done this week, my new black cardigan, my fave sunglasses, my fave screwdriver, the cord to the computer so I can upload photos, and my hopes of ever being on top of it all again. If only I had the chocolate.
Does this have anything to do with the fact that I am working more, planning more, and trying to do more every day? Does it mean I am trying to do too much? Maybe. But I don't know what I could cut out, because the reality is that I actually want to add more. As each one of us adds more activities, they all seem to drain on me. But time itself is pulling a disappearing act on me.
As are my babies. Where have they gone? I have these KIDS now. It hit me the other morning as they all put on their own shoes (even the Tan man!) and walked their little selves out to the van ahead of me to take Phebes to school. As I followed them, I truly saw them. Not a baby in the bunch. And yet they are. They always will be.
Tanner said, "Das mah mom," pointing at me the other day. First sentence. Made my heart melt. Phoebe cried that I went to work and she went to dance tonight. Annika has crawled in bed with me the last two nights. Yes, they are my babies. I guess as long as I can find that, who cares where my lists are.
But I still need to find the chocolate.
